 Have you ever wondered why some people effortlessly stick to New Year's resolutions while others abandon them by mid-January? Gretchen Rubin, the author of "The Happiness Project," offers illuminating answers through her Four Tendencies framework—a personality system that reveals how we respond to expectations. Rubin identifies two types of expectations we all face: outer expectations (like work deadlines) and inner expectations (like personal goals). How we respond to these expectations determines which of four tendencies we fall into. The four tendencies are as follows: Upholders These self-starters readily meet both outer and inner expectations. They wake up thinking, "What's on the schedule today?" and keep commitments to themselves just as seriously as those made to others. While they excel at meeting goals, Upholders can sometimes struggle with flexibility when plans change unexpectedly. Questioners This group questions all expectations and will meet them only if they believe they make sense. They resist anything arbitrary and need to understand the "why" behind every request. Once convinced something is worthwhile, Questioners follow through beautifully—though their constant need for justification can exhaust those around them. Obligers Obligers respond readily to outer expectations but struggle with inner ones. They'll meet a friend for a 6 a.m. workout, but can't seem to exercise alone. This is the largest tendency group, and Obligers often feel frustrated by their inability to meet self-imposed goals. The solution? Create external accountability—hire a trainer, join a class, or find a workout buddy—to transform those inner expectations into outer ones. Rebels Rebels resist all expectations, both outer and inner. They value freedom and self-determination above everything, wanting to act in alignment with their identity and choices. Tell a Rebel they must do something, and watch them dig in their heels. However, Rebels can accomplish remarkable things when they reframe goals as personal choices that express their authentic selves rather than obligations. Although it's good to understand your tendency, keep in mind that your natural tendencies may shift in different circumstances or with age and maturity. However, by working with our natural inclinations rather than fighting against them, we can design systems and strategies that actually work for our unique personality, making it far easier to achieve our goals. An Obliger can stop beating themselves up for needing external accountability, while a Questioner can honor their need for information before committing. You can read more about the Four Tendencies on Ruben's website. Stay tuned for my next blog post, where I reveal my tendency and share how I work with it to get stuff done. See you soon! If you liked this, you may like the article Run Towards the Fear.  Is Coaching Right for You? Take the quiz to find out!
 In this post, we dive more deeply into Denslow Brown’s Processing Modalities. If you need a refresher on this concept, take a look at my previous post, Discover Your Unique Modalities and How They Shape Your Perception. In this post, we look at the modality that many of us rely on the most, our visual sense. VISUAL: Seeing The visual processing modality is experienced through the eyes and visual perception. I recently read An Immense World: How Animal Senses Reveal the Hidden Realms Around Us by Ed Yong. This book tells us how the creatures around us sense the world through vibrations, smells, and electromagnetic fields. It’s an astonishing book and I highly recommend it! Yong tells us that, unlike many other animals, humans have evolved to be highly visual creatures. I imagine many of us would agree that our visual sense is one we greatly value. I was a graphic designer for many years, and visual aesthetics and design have always been important to me. I have always treasured this strong visual sense, but in the last few years, I have noticed that my color perception is slightly shifting, and I don’t see colors as I used to. Both my strong visual sense and my changing color perception are examples of what Brown calls the Processing Modality Strength Continuum, which can range from weak to competent to gifted. My experience shows we can be weak in some areas of a modality and strong in other ways and this affects how we interact with the world.  Brown explains that in addition to our modality preferences, we have varying strengths with each modality, ranging from weak to competent to gifted. Our vision also affects how we approach tasks and interact with our surroundings. This is something I have clearly seen in my work as a professional organizer. One person functions well in a space filled with objects, while another needs everything out of sight. One person does not care (or even notice) that they have no artwork on their walls, while another actively curates their space like a museum. These are examples of what Brown calls the Processing Modality Sensitivity Continuum, which can range from Hyposensitive (oblivious) to competent to Hypersensitive (very aware).  We have varying sensitivities across different modalities ranging from hyposensitive (unaware) to tolerant to hypersensitive (very aware). Consider how your visual strengths and sensitivities impact your work environment. Does the space you work in support your productivity? What do you visually see in your work space (whether it’s an office, a coffee shop, or the kitchen table)? Is there visual distraction (the dishes in the sink) or inspiration (a vision board or expansive view)? How do you feel when you’re working in this space? What contributes to that feeling? Are there simple things you can do to help this space be a visually more supportive environment? Is it time to change things up and try working in another space? If you are someone who is highly visual, it’s valuable to spend some time exploring how you interact with your surroundings. Creating a visually supportive environment can increase your productivity and your general joy in life! Look for future posts where I dive into the other modalities, how your strength and sensitivities in each can show up, and how this can affect focus and productivity. Learn about all nine Processing Modalities: VISUAL The Power of Sight: Engaging with Your Surroundings Using the Visual Modality AUDITORY The Art of Listening: How Sound and Silence Influence Our Productivity KINESTHETIC Build Focus with Movement: Understanding the Mind-Body Connection TACTILE Feeling the Difference: How Touch Affects Your Space and Mood TASTE & SMELL Elevate Your Workspace: Using Taste & Smell for a More Inspiring Environment VERBAL Verbal Processing Modalities: How Language Shapes Our Experience EMOTIONAL How Emotions Influence our Bodies and our Ability to Stay Focused COGNITIVE Knowing Your Mind: Navigating the Cognitive Modality INTUITIVE Cultivating Intuitive Knowing: Learning to Tap into Your Inner Wisdom © 2013 Denslow Brown. From the book, The Processing Modalities Guide by Denslow Brown Hickory Guild Press, 2012 $25 www.OrganizerCoach.com  Don't miss my newsletter, Find Your Focus. It’s full of useful and practical ways to bridge the gap between knowing and doing to help you reach your goals. Newsletter subscribers also receive special discounts and first access to upcoming group coaching offers and memberships.
 Do you prefer silence, music, or a humming café while working on your computer? When making a big decision, do you listen to your gut, consult a friend, or research all options? Do you learn a new game by reading the instructions, watching a video, or asking someone to teach you? Each approach to working, decision-making, and learning represents a distinct processing modality. The concept that people process information differently is not new; many of us identify as visual or auditory learners. However, Denslow Brown’s book, The Processing Modalities Guide, takes this idea a step further. I first encountered this valuable concept in her Strengths-Based Coaching class, and it has helped me better understand my own and my clients' experiences. Brown's identifies nine ways to process information:  Modality Strength Continuum Brown explains that in addition to our modality preferences, we also have varying strengths across different modalities, ranging from weak to gifted. For example, someone may have poor vision, an exceptional sense of smell, and arthritis in their joints affecting their movement. These physical differences can greatly influence their perception of the world and the extent to which they rely on each modality.  Brown explains that in addition to our modality preferences, we have varying strengths with each modality, ranging from weak to competent to gifted. Modality Sensitivity Continuum Brown also identifies that individuals have varying sensitivities across the modalities, ranging from hyposensitive (oblivious) to hypersensitive (very aware). For example, someone may have a hard time concentrating when their partner is on the phone in the next room (hypersensitive auditory modality) or they may not notice a huge new painting in the living room (hyposensitive visual modality). These sensitivities affect what we notice and how we rely on the different modalities.  We have varying sensitivities across different modalities ranging from hyposensitive (unaware) to tolerant to hypersensitive (very aware). It makes sense to pay attention to these strengths and sensitivities because our awareness of them helps us design environments and actions that draw on our strengths. This is an overview of the processing modalities. Over the next few months, I will be going more deeply into each of the modalities and how your strength and sensitivities in each can show up in your daily life. Stay tuned! Learn about all nine Processing Modalities: VISUAL The Power of Sight: Engaging with Your Surroundings Using the Visual Modality AUDITORY The Art of Listening: How Sound and Silence Influence Our Productivity KINESTHETIC Build Focus with Movement: Understanding the Mind-Body Connection TACTILE Feeling the Difference: How Touch Affects Your Space and Mood TASTE & SMELL Elevate Your Workspace: Using Taste & Smell for a More Inspiring Environment VERBAL Verbal Processing Modalities: How Language Shapes Our Experience EMOTIONAL How Emotions Influence our Bodies and our Ability to Stay Focused COGNITIVE Knowing Your Mind: Navigating the Cognitive Modality INTUITIVE Cultivating Intuitive Knowing: Learning to Tap into Your Inner Wisdom © 2013 Denslow Brown. From the book, The Processing Modalities Guide by Denslow Brown Hickory Guild Press, 2012 $25 www.OrganizerCoach.com  If you’re ready to discover the power of coaching schedule a complimentary Clarity Call today.
 . “5 Best Tricks for productivity!” “Organizing Hacks from a Pro!” “10 Tips to Streamline Your Email!” Do these types of headlines grab your attention? They’re meant to. As life moves at a quicker pace with increased complexity, we want quick answers to our dilemmas so we can move on to “more important” stuff. I feel like we’re living in a tips and tricks world as a result. Social media is full of tips for being more productive, focused, and organized. Sometimes these ideas can be a useful springboard, but I also see how people get stuck in a cycle of trying one hack after another looking for the “perfect” productivity or organizing tool. I’ve seen too many abandoned systems to think there is an organizing silver bullet. The hard truth is that it’s not the system, but the maintenance of the system, that really makes or breaks it. And maintenance takes time. When clients come to me looking for tips and tricks for their time and space challenges, I often have to resist my own desire to give them answers. In those moments I have to take a breath and instead find out more about their particular challenge and (even better) what they are seeking rather than the outcome they are trying to avoid. Only then can we brainstorm ideas that could work for their life. I'm not a big fan of tips and tricks, but they can be beneficial if the focus is on positive habit development rather than the perfect tool or hack. For example, creating space in your schedule for the reality of paperwork, email, and other “adult stuff” is essential. The best trick is not getting too caught up in someone else's ideas. When we get curious about how you function best and what supports your activation, we can start to create an intuitive process for you. Anything that helps you reflect on your experience and gain new awareness is positive in my book. If you like this post then you may like We are Each Naturally Creative Resourceful and Whole (NCRW).  If you’re ready to discover the power of coaching schedule a complimentary Clarity Call today.
 Image: Lili Popper Unsplash Kim came to coaching struggling to move forward on her new business. She had a big deadline in a few months, and she wasn’t making the progress she'd hoped for. She had a history of struggling with deadlines. She often waited until the last minute to get things done, creating an exhausting dash to the finish line. Doubt and self-judgment surfaced whenever she thought of meeting this new deadline and she felt she was going in circles. Wanting to do things differently, she reached out for support. Together, Kim and I looked at her passion and sense of purpose for her new business. She expressed that meeting this deadline was a step toward growing her business and helping others through her work. We looked at how her ADHD and self-judgment were showing up in the situation and explored ways to boost her self-care. Talking through the challenges helped Kim get clear on the steps she needed to take to meet her deadline. Armed with new self-awareness, Kim turned the fuzzy parts of her big project into actionable steps. She was able to use the perspective of her “future self” as motivation for meeting smaller deadlines in the present. This set her up for success in meeting her larger goal. How can you tap into your future self? Let’s say you have an important meeting coming up that you want to be ready for, but you haven't completed your work. Imagine yourself arriving at this meeting feeling calm and prepared. What have you done to get yourself to that place? Get specific, break it down. When can you plan to do this work before the meeting? How long will it take? Be sure to build in extra time. Put this time on your schedule and protect it. When the time comes to do these tasks, imagine your future self arriving at the meeting prepared, and use this as fuel to work on these tasks and to see them through. The excellent cognitive behavior-based podcast A Slight Change of Plans has an episode about exactly this idea called Your Future Self Needs Your Help Today. Kim’s example shows some of the challenges clients come to coaching with:
By focusing on strengths and goals, we build in strong motivation that’s based on the things you care about. With this new perspective you can:
If you like this post then you may like How I Fell For Coaching. See you soon. RESOURCE: A Slight Change of Plans podcast with Dr. Maya Shankar This is one of my favorite podcasts! It blends neuroscience, behavioral change, and storytelling. The episode Your Future Self Needs Your Help Today is all about using the motivation of your future self to get into action today. Names and identifying details have been changed for privacy.  Don't miss my newsletter, Find Your Focus. It’s full of useful and practical ways to bridge the gap between knowing and doing to help you reach your goals. Newsletter subscribers also receive special discounts and first access to upcoming group coaching offers and memberships.
 Image: Jeremy Thomas from Unsplash Before I started training as a coach, I thought life coaching was for other people, but not for me. It all felt vaguely indulgent for people with too much time on their hands. On a whim in 2020, I took an eight-week coaching class and I finally grasped how powerful it can be to have a reflective and focused conversation with someone who holds your goals. I was hooked. Over the last three years, I have moved steadily through courses focusing on strengths coaching, brain-based coaching, ADHD coaching, and body-based coaching, and I have loved it all! Now I see coaching as an important tool for growth, self-awareness, and action. It has helped me move toward my passions and through the inevitable bumps that come along the way. I have worked with many coaches over the last few years and benefited greatly from these amazing people. Coaching has helped me to do things such as:
My question for you: Is there an area in your life that you’re feeling ready to explore and bring new awareness to? How can you cultivate curiosity this week in this area? See you soon! If you like this post you may like the post My Journey from Organizing to Coaching.  If you’re ready to discover the power of coaching schedule a complimentary Clarity Call today.
 Clients often reach out for support at times of transition in their lives. Life has gotten more complicated because of a move, a new job, or a health challenge. Old ways of doing things just don’t seem to be cutting it anymore, and they can’t quite put their finger on what needs to change. They’re feeling stuck and overwhelmed, and they reach out for support. A period of transition can be an ideal time to work with a coach. Together we can find your untapped resources and strengthen your self-care, so you become responsive instead of reactive in the face of challenges. We can uncover your larger goals in life and help you work toward reaching them instead of just putting out fires. For coaching to be productive, it’s important to be open to learning more about yourself and having reflective conversations. We aim to set aside self-judgment and bring curiosity to your experience. The topics we can cover are endless, but here are a few ideas to consider:
Through our conversations, we’re looking for your insights and uncovering your expertise about yourself. At first it may sound strange, but your answers are much more powerful and profound, and more relevant to your life, than my suggestions (neuroscience backs this up). Working together, we can uncover the answers and actions that will help you. We all get stuck at times and working with a coach is a great way to move forward. You can read more about my coaching process here. My questions for you: Is there a goal that you are trying to reach that you can’t seem to make progress on? Where do you feel stuck? Is there just one action you can take this week to move the needle? See you soon. If you like this post you may like the post How I Fell for Coaching.  New to coaching? Not sure if it's right for you? Take the quick Mindset Quiz is to determine if coaching with is a fit for you. Take it below! |
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